These are letters to Jack, my son, and my daughter, Audrey. You have given me the gift of motherhood. This is just a little gift back. I want to share my experiences with you of your childhood from my perspective of watching you grow - of being your Mom.

Sunday, May 25, 2008

Stupid is as Stupid Does


I don't know how to preface this but to just admit to you that I am prone to acts of stupidity sometimes.

Yes, sometimes.

Now, I may try to color it in a different light. I could say that I'm clumsy or spastic at times. Those are true, too, but it just doesn't encompass all of it.

So, on Tuesday night - Clay was out of town. When your Daddy is out of town, I like to fall asleep amongst chaos. I turn on the TV and the dogs sleep next to the bed so that I can here their elephant stampede in my brain every time they decide to get up on their big dinosaur feet in the middle of the night and have a ridiculous parade around the bedroom.

As it happened, my blanket was dragging on the ground on Tuesday night so the dogs decided to sleep on it and, during the night, they claimed more and more for themselves. Sometime in the dark of night, I got cold and very pissed off at the dogs for claiming so much of my blanket so in an act of pure evilness, I decided to exact my revenge on them by sweeping the blanket out from under them and claiming it back for myself thus teaching them a lesson for leaving me in the cold.

When I grabbed the blanket and yanked very hard, I forgot that the remote control was on the blanket and catapulted it directly into my face. I remember that it hurt. Badly. But I was so tired that I waited for the pain to subside and then fell back asleep.

The next morning I couldn't figure out why my eye wasn't opening when my other eye was. So I looked in the mirror. I remember thinking "oh. shit."

Here is my eye now on Saturday after (...wednesday...thursday...friday....saturday)... FOUR days of healing.... and - bear in mind - it looks a world better than it did.....
Which is why I was a little too embarrassed to blog about this till now.

2 days of business conference where I looked like a recovering prize fighter and now all my co-workers think that Daddy is abusive because no one is buying my "smacked myself in the face with the remote control" story.


What a week! :)



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