These are letters to Jack, my son, and my daughter, Audrey. You have given me the gift of motherhood. This is just a little gift back. I want to share my experiences with you of your childhood from my perspective of watching you grow - of being your Mom.
Monday, June 22, 2009
I always knew that the transition from one to two would be a little rough. I guess I wasn't certain on how rough the sleep deprivation would be at this older age. It hasn't been easy. But the two of you have been wonderful.Audrey - you have such moments of clarity, even from just a few days old. You are looking around, taking in all the sights you can soak up. The late nights get wiped away so fast in these moments.And Jack - you wake up sometimes in the middle of the night, but more often than not, you sleep through. You are so tender and sweet with your baby sister. Gentle touches on the back of her head since you know that she has the soft spot on the front of her head. You kiss and hug her so gently it's as though you are afraid that she is made of egg shells and aren't taking any chances that she might break.
Also, with the lesser amounts of energy that I have and the time struggle of juggling responsibilities, you are incredibly resourceful. We found games online that you became very proficient at as well as typing in Microsoft Word, so your Daddy picked up some educational games and you have blown us away from there. You can type your name on the computer keyboard and navigate through numbers and matching and other challenging programs barely by batting an eye.
I had an incident at 3 weeks where I passed a very large blood clot with you present. It was scary. Very suddenly, I felt a pop and there was blood - lots of it. I was there with you both, Jack and Audrey, but only you - Jack - were aware of what had happened. You saw more than I would have wanted you to. I had you look in my eyes and I told you - "look at me, Jack. You can tell that Mommy isn't hurt, right? This is just because Mommy had a baby." You could tell by my face that I was okay and so you were, too.
You are so strong and so am I - because of you, your Daddy, and Audrey. My family makes me strong and the early days here of the sleep deprivation will pass and I'll find my groove. I know it. Thank you.
Wednesday, June 17, 2009
We recently went on a trip to the Lake and found that the car is insufficient for travel with two children and two adults when you add in the presence of the two dogs. Thus, the van is now here. We traded in Daddy's Silver Car as you, Jack, call it, but I don't think you are too upset.
The minute you saw the van, you declared that it's the Perfect Size! and you climb around in it anytime you are able which includes anytime we are headed somewhere and you haven't been belted in yet. There is much nagging to get you out of the back and into your seat once you have bolted to the back for the fun of it.
I think I'm going to love van ownership! I certainly know that you do, Jack!
Monday, June 15, 2009
Uncle Steve (Don't ask him to deliver anything for you....) :)Aunt Terry
Your closest girl cousin Daphne (although the third musketeer is due in October)
Your Cousins Lisa and Hannah
Yes, I did dress you in matching Simpson's outfits. I stand by the fact that Mother knows best and it's CUTE! :)
Your other Aunt Lisa
And many, many more not pictured like the Shanks, Kelly and Bobby, and just about every boy cousin and Uncle you possess. You really have met the whole damn fam and have fallen in love with the lot of them!
Wednesday, June 10, 2009
Wednesday, June 03, 2009
The day has come and gone and three have become four. What sweet addition that is!Welcome to the family, Audrey!Your due date was May 27th and, like your brother before you, you were late. Also like your brother before you, it took an eviction notice from the womb to get you here. :)You were scheduled for induction on Friday, May 29th. I woke with barely any sleep (up by 4AM so excited to have you) and the hospital postponed your induction. I threw my own personal pity party with an invitation of one and cried away most of the morning. This pregnancy became pretty uncomfortable by the end - I felt sick all the time, I was swollen beyond belief and I was uncomfortable and in pain most of the time, but no labor.Finally, I decided that was useless and so Clay and I headed out to lunch with Jack. It had been a long morning and no call to come in so we decided not to wait around anymore.The call from the hospital finally came around 2. We packed up Jack with his overnight bag and went to Grandma Mary's where he spent the rest of the evening and the night while we headed to the hospital. I was in the room with the Pitosin drip by 4:30. By 9:30, there still wasn't much progress, so I started to ask myself what I could do. I am not a big person when it comes to pain, but I put up the head of the bed and put down the feet of the bed and by 12:30AM March 30th, I had progressed to 4 cm dilated. I called my Dad and told him, and he said that he probably had a couple more hours so I should call him back.I needed this to happen faster so I asked the nurse what else I could do and she suggested sit indian style until I was ready. By 1:05 or so, I was in a lot of pain and the nurse confirmed I was at 10 cm. I called Dad and he arrived in 14 minutes and my Doctor shortly after. I started pushing and Audrey arrived at 1:27AM on May 30th. What a beautiful baby you are, Audrey! You reminded me immediately of your brother. There are differences between the two of you, of course, but at this point in time, it's kind of hard to pinpoint what they are. Jack loved you right from the first moment he saw you. He wanted to bring you home right away. He explained to Daddy that Mommy's have to stay at the hospital, but the babies can go home. So it was fine if I was a missing component, but you needed to be with him. You have won over all of us with your grunts and squeaks and you are quickly upset if you are hungry and the food isn't immediately there in your hungry little mouth.You are incredibly alert for such a little one! Of course, you are entranced by light and dark contrasts and you are quick to find those and stare, but you do also seem to notice the shapes people's faces and will occassionally try out a cute little coo that melts me. Jack is smitten, doesn't want the other children in his room to touch you and he's very careful with you, wanting to snuggle and kiss you and help you by bringing you your binky or your teddy bear. We are all very lucky to have you in our family, Audrey, and are so excited that you are here!Love,