These are letters to Jack, my son, and my daughter, Audrey. You have given me the gift of motherhood. This is just a little gift back. I want to share my experiences with you of your childhood from my perspective of watching you grow - of being your Mom.

Sunday, August 19, 2007

R and R


This weekend Daddy, you and I headed down to the Lake of the Ozarks for some much needed Rest and Relaxation. Daddy will be out of town for the next couple of weeks and I think we all needed to simply put ourselves in an environment that is not conducive to stress.

It's amazing how stress melts away in these surroundings!

The drive down here was wonderful. 3 1/2 hours in a car wouldn't sound like a good lead in, but it was. Frank discussions between your Daddy and I were fantastic and I have come to turns with my meltdowns as of late.

Don't get me wrong - I don't like the feeling and am going to try to do all I can not to let myself get to that point again, but to think that it will never happen again wouldn't be realistic. This is the beginning of the first challenging phase and it won't be the last. You want so badly to be independent and yet need me still for so many things. It's frustrating to you. Sometimes you ask for my help and get upset when I try to give it to you and I get upset because I can't seem to win and all I really want is to make you happy, but it's impossible to make someone happy all of the time - and that's my weakness. I am a person that wants people to like me all the time, to make people happy all the time and this just isn't possible. I set myself up for failure when I do that, but it's a part of my personality that I need to work on. :) At least I can recognize that and try to stay aware of it.

So then, we were at the Lake. You got to steer the boat for the first time and we cruised the Lake at a very slow pace. So slow in fact that you enjoyed walking and exploring the boat while in motion.

April and Hercules were with us, too. They both seemed to enjoy being a part of the family time and not being left behind as has been their usual as of late. (Although they both looked like their tongues where trying to escape their halitosis breath into the humid summer air....)

You and Hercules had similar interests in the Lake and were kind of like buddies in adventure this weekend.

The weather was great for being out on the boat. Not too hot and not too sunny. Probably not the best bikini day because of the lack of sun and the Taco Bell and Smirnoff Ice that I had consumed (picture a bikini on a distended belly.... YIKES!) but very, very relaxing so - who cares! :)

There was a lot of indulgent eating, some drinking and lots to do. We visited the pool, the lake and the playground this weekend and you were very entertained with everything including reaquainting yourself with our Lake toys. It was great.

The only thing that popped up was a surprising spill that I took down the stairs. You had a poopy diaper and were resistant as usual to me changing it. I was carrying you downstairs and by my own fault alone, misstepped and landed on my back. You were surprised, but unharmed by the fall and I alone have a mark on my lower back from the accident. It's a little bruised and sore this morning, but nothing serious. :)

I guess we know where that accident prone gene comes from now, don't we?

It was a great weekend and a good reality check. I feel like I'm coming home with a new perspective and am ready for the next two weeks. Bring them on! :)



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