Letters to Jack & Audrey

WORD TO THE WISE

7-31-06

Jack,

Good Morning! Well - I wanted to share with you a little word to the wise. Watch yourself as you grow older and become frustrated. I see you struggling with it now and I am trying to help you figure out how to deal with these feelings when I realize that I still struggle with my own feelings of frustration on a daily basis.

Just yesterday, someone (I won't say whom) commented that they had laughed at me because I had chosen to ride in the backseat with you when we drive somewhere as a family.

Here's a word to the wise that I learned on dealing with frustration. Don't go with your initial instincts. Although, the world may temporarily become red and you may have urges to open your mouth and bite that person's head off or allow utterances to issue forth that you know you will regret in the long run - resist the urge! Clamp your teeth shut and force yourself to smile non-challantly (even if you are giving the finger to said person under the table).

I have found that I don't react very well to criticisms of how I raise you. I realize that I'm not perfect and that I make mistakes but I find it INCREDIBLY bold of other people to point these out to me when they are certainly not in possession of the perfect formula for parenting themselves. Don't get me wrong - I can understand and even appreciate a shared suggestion when mothers are comparing stories and asking for information on how someone has dealt with something in the past or someone volunteering their experiences when they see you going through the same thing, but I don't understand the purpose of criticism when no one is being hurt by the actions in question or helped by the criticism.

Anyway, in light of our quest recently to figure out how to manage our strongest feelings, it's brought to light for me that this is an ongoing process that I still need some help with myself.

FYI - you aren't hitting anyone else anymore although you do still sometimes hit yourself, but you do complain and fuss when being made to do something that you don't want to do. I think we all feel that way, don't we? :)

Love you, Sweetie!

Love,

Mommy

Postnote: We went this past weekend to Grant's Farm as a family. It was us, the Shanks, the Wassels and Grandma and Grandpa Dough! Here are some pictures from that fun outing!:

You were so cute greeting all the animals from the train!